With Viagra such a hit, Pfizer is bringing
forth a whole line of drugs
oriented towards improving the performance of men
in today's society....
DIRECTRA - a dose of this drug given to men before
leaving on car trips
caused 72 percent of them to stop and ask
directions when they got
lost, compared to a control group of 0.2 percent.
PROJECTRA - Men given this experimental new drug
were far more likely
to actually finish a household repair project
before starting a new one.
CHILDAGRA - Men taking this drug reported a sudden,
overwhelming urge
to perform more child-care tasks - especially
cleaning up spills and
COMPLIMENTRA - In clinical trials, 82 percent of
middle-aged men
administered this drug noticed that their wives had
a new hairstyle.
Currently being tested to see if its effects extend
to noticing new
BUYAGRA - Married and otherwise attached men
reported a sudden urge to
buy their sweeties expensive jewelry and gifts
after talking this drug
for only two days. Still to be seen: whether the
drug can be continued
for a period longer than your favorites store's
return limit. WARNING:
The Surgeon General,s Office is investigating
reports of near
catastrophic side-effects of this drug when taken
by women
NEGA-VIAGRA - Has the exact opposite effect of
Viagra. Currently
undergoing clinical trials on sitting U.S.
presidents.
NEGA-SPORTAGRA - This drug had the strange effect
of making men want to
turn off televised sports and actually converse
with other family
FLATULAGRA - This complex drug converts men's
noxious intestinal gases
back into food solids. Special bonus: Dosage can be
doubled for long
NAGRA - A conceptual drug that will enhance a
man,s stamina and
endurance in tolerating excessive nagging.
Pfizer has already reported
a record number of volunteer test subjects.
FLYAGRA - This drug has been showing great promise
in treating men with
O.F.D. (Open Fly Disorder). Especially useful for
men on Viagra.
PRYAGRA - About to fail its clinical trial, this
drug gave men in the
test group an irresistible urge to dig into the
personal affairs of
other people. Note: Apparent over-dose turned three
test subjects into
LIAGRA - This drug causes men to be less than
truthful when being asked
about their sexual affairs. Will be available
Regular, Grand Jury and
Presidential Strength versions.
